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In July's magazine:

This was a bumper edition for July & August, full of good things:

Hanna Woodall wrote reflectively on the eve of her ordination to the priesthood;

the Prayer for the Month was originally written by Robert Louis Stevenson;

Martin Hannant gave a farewell interview before retiring as headteacher at our church primary school;

on a lighter note, there was an eight-year old's explanation of God, a piece of increasingly Germanic European English; and an account of a ninety-eight year old woman's battle with her bank.

Meanwhile, Mark Woodall was too busy to stop, and John Partington marked the Government's new indoor smoking ban with an account of the history of tobacco-growing in Winchcombe.

 

FOREWORD

Last month John Sutcliffe reflected on fifty years of ordained ministry. This month Hanna Woodall thinks on a deacon about to start her life as a priest.

This will be an exciting month for me, as I will have been ordained priest on June 30th at Gloucester Cathedral. I then preside at the Eucharist for the first time on July 1st, and do my first wedding at the end of that week. I’m really looking forward to it. So what’s being a priest all about? My little girl asked me if I got to wear a different colour dog collar or a big badge. Outwardly there’ll be no great visible difference but I believe that God continues to change you for the role He’s called you to fulfil. So I’m looking forward to being transformed through the Holy Spirit for the next stage of my life.

For me, entering the priesthood ultimately means being obedient to God’s will and walking in faith. Being ordained isn’t like any ordinary decision. I didn’t wake up one morning and think ‘I’ll go and apply to be a priest in the Anglican Church,’ it snuck up on me slowly as I became more involved in my local church after I gave up my teaching career to raise my children. Then one day I heard God’s words like a flash going off in my head ‘ put yourself forward for ordination.’ I thought I was delusional and tried to dismiss this call from God. But when God wants you to do something He doesn’t give up. So while in my head I was making all the excuses I could as to why it wouldn’t be a good idea, in my heart I knew I had to go forward. It was important for me to be obedient to what I believed God was asking me. If it was His will He’d provide the wherewithal. And that’s exactly what happened. My faith has deepened as I’ve felt God sustaining both me and the family. I managed to train away from home for two years and have made it to the end of my deacon’s year with my family and marriage still intact. I think that is a miracle and give thanks to God for His grace and strength.

Being a priest is a great privilege. You are all God’s precious people, and priestly ministry means building up the body of Christ here in this community in Winchcombe. It means walking the journey of faith with the people, being a focus; gathering people around the word and sacrament in worship. A priest should be an encourager, helping people to discern their gifts and enabling them to use them in God’s service. It’s important to be able to feel ‘what’s in the air’ in terms of the culture we live in and help people respond to life’s challenges in a Christian way; to be a builder of bridges between the church and community. A priest should help lead the people in mission to the community and must be a good example of one who serves in humility. Reaching out to all people is vital; the church should always be outward looking, rejoicing in diversity and inclusivity. You know you’re an inclusive church when you attract eccentrics and oddballs, and they feel at home, feel welcomed, loved. The church is the sacrament of Christ’s love for the world. An outward, visible sign of the love of God for the whole of creation.

I’m just another ordinary person, trying to live a life of faith and obedience to the one true God, trying to live out my life, as I believe God wants me to. There’s nothing superior or different in my vocation. You all have a unique vocation which only you can fulfil. You are trying to work out how to live your life in faith and in the way of Christ. I am privileged to be part of your journeys.

I’d like to say that it’s really the people who shape their priests. God works through the people you live among to form you for His work and I’m very grateful for all that you have given me as a church community.

Hanna was ordained priest in Gloucester Cathedral on June 30th 2007

Hanna Woodall

PRAYER FOR THE MONTH

“Everyone wants to be happy. There is no one who will not agree with me in this, almost before the words are out of my mouth.” – the opening sentence of a reflection by St Augustine on morality.  And Christian thinkers, following Aristotle and the Platonists, have agreed that morality and happiness – how we live and how we feel – belong together.  God wants us to be happy.
This month’s prayer was written by Robert Louis Stevenson (1850-94):


Grant to us, O Lord, the royalty of inward happiness, and the serenity which comes from living close to thee.  Daily renew in us the sense of joy, and let the eternal spirit of the Father dwell in our souls and bodies, filling every corner of our hearts with light and grace; so that, bearing about with us the infection of good courage, we may be diffusers of life, and may meet all ills and cross accidents with gallant and high-hearted happiness, giving thee thanks always for all things.  Amen.


Of course, Jesus himself said “Blessed are those who mourn ...”, and there is no place for a complacent, shallow, happiness in the face of others’ hardship or misery.  But God’s coming Kingdom is one of ineffable joy – and Christians are invited to experience, and called to share, that deep happiness.  May it be yours this summer holiday!

 

GOODBYE MR HANNANT

In a few weeks’ time, the staff and pupils of Winchcombe Abbey Primary School will say goodbye to Martin Hannant, their Head Teacher. In this Parish Magazine exclusive, we find out why Martin is leaving and what he has planned for the future.

Martin, when did you start as head at Winchcombe Abbey Primary?  
I started as head teacher in January 2002. Before that I had been Head at Oak Hill C of E (at Alderton and Dumbleton) for eleven years.

Why did you choose to work at Winchcombe Abbey?
There were a number of reasons. I knew the school fairly well already and knew it had gone through a rather traumatic amalgamation. It was a school in which I wanted to work and where I felt I could make a difference. I was drawn by the fact it was a Church school. I already knew several of the staff so I realized it already had some very good teachers and support staff. I also realized it also had great potential. It was in an attractive position with modern buildings set in a beautiful part of the countryside.

What changes have you seen during your time here?
The extension to the staff room, the building of a new maths room. Interactive whiteboards in every class. The reintroduction of French teaching at KS2 – and yet more and more Government initiatives. The building of the small children’s’ play area has started just before I leave. The wonderful improvement of involve-ment with the unique community of Winchcombe. I only wish we had our fence across the field – hopefully next year.

How have you changed during your time at Winchcombe Abbey?
I have learnt so much by working in Winchcombe. There have been many challenges, a few failures but thankfully many successes. I have a few more grey hairs, a few more pounds round the waist and a few more worry lines. However I also take with me so many happy memories.

Is there someone in a position of leadership who you admire and/or are inspired by?
I would have to say I am inspired by the leadership and teaching of Jesus. He teaches us how we should live our lives, and that we should treat other people the way we like to be treated ourselves. In my office I have a sign that ‘Nothing is going to happen today, Lord, that you and I can’t handle together’. I know he is always there to help me: if I am stuck for what to do, I ask for his wisdom and guidance. I also read in a book once that you should welcome each person as if welcoming Christ himself. That is what I aim to do.

What is your most memorable moment at Winchcombe Abbey?
It would have to be the staff Christmas pantomimes. I write them each year. Everyone is in it that wants to be in it. We have one read- through and then walk out in costume, scripts in hand and perform for the children. We have an extremely talented staff who really enjoy doing the pantos. The behaviour of the children is also excellent. They know what to say –“He’s behind you” etc. They can also get very excited, but calm down very quickly and sensibly. So far we have done Cinderella (twice), Dick Whittington, Aladdin and Jack and the Beanstalk. Sadly, parents are not invited to watch but there are a few embarrassing photos around.
Why have you chosen to retire, you don’t look old enough? Very kind of you to say so. Actually I am going for early retirement. I have simply gone for work/life balance. It is a wonderfully happy and calm school with a brilliant staff, delightful children, very supportive parents and an excellent Governing Body and I have been very happy here. However after over sixteen years of being a Head my brain is tired. I need to recharge my batteries and then take on new challenges.

What are you going to do with your time now?
I have a number of gardening and decorating jobs that need doing. I will continue doing some consultancy work and want to train to do RE inspections. I am also training to be a Methodist lay preacher and have not had much time for study recently. My wife and I are also hoping to travel and have booked a holiday to New Zealand in February.

What do you think you will miss the most?
The staff, the children, the friendships – Mrs Keylock’s lunches – the beautiful view over Winch-combe, set in the valley as I come along the Quarry Road towards Sudeley Castle, and the occasional insult from Mr Petchey.

Thank you Martin. We wish you a very happy retirement and success in all your future plans.

Margaret Collins

EXPLAINING GOD

The following was written, or so we're told, by an eight-year old for his homework assignment

“One of God’s main jobs is making people.  He makes them to replace the ones that die, so there will be enough people to take care of things on earth.  He doesn’t make grown-ups, just babies.  I think because they are smaller and easier to make.  That way he doesn’t have to take up his valuable time teaching them to talk and walk.  He can just leave that to mothers and fathers.”

“God’s second most important job is listening to prayers.  An awful lot of this goes on, since some people, like vicars and things, pray at times beside bedtime.  God doesn’t have time to listen to the radio or TV because of this.  Because he hears everything, there must be a terrible lot of noise in his ears, unless he has thought of a way to turn it off.”

“God sees everything and hears everything and is everywhere which keeps him pretty busy.  So you shouldn’t go wasting his time by going over your mum and dad’s head asking for something they said you couldn’t have.”

“Atheists are people who don’t believe in God.  I don’t think there are any in my town.  At least there aren’t any who come to our church.”

“Jesus is God’s son.  He used to do all the hard work, like walking on water and performing miracles and trying to teach the people who didn’t want to learn about God.  They finally got tired of him preaching to them and they crucified him.  But he was good and kind; like his father, and he told his father that they didn’t know what they were doing and to forgive them and God said OK.”

“His dad (God) appreciated everything that he had done and all his hard work on earth so he told him he didn’t have to go out on the road anymore.  He could stay in heaven.  So he did.  And now he helps his dad out by listening to prayers and seeing things which are important for God to take care of and which ones he can take care of himself without having to bother God.  Like a secretary, only more important.”

“You can pray anytime you want and they are sure to help you because they got it worked out so one of them is on duty all the time.”

“You should always go to church on Sunday because it makes God happy and if there’s anybody you want to make happy, it’s God!  Don’t miss church to do something you think will be more fun like going to the beach.  This is wrong.  And besides the sun doesn’t come out at the beach until noon anyway.”  

“If you don’t believe in God, besides being an atheist, you will be very lonely, because your parents can’t go everywhere with you, but God can.  It is good to know He’s around you when you’re scared, in the dark or when you can’t swim and you get thrown into real deep water by big kids.  And … that’s why I believe in God.”

 

EUROPEAN ENGLISH

European Community adopts English as Official Language

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.  As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling has some room for improvement, and has accepted a five-year phase-in plan that would become known as ‘Euro-English’.  In the first year, ‘s’ will replace the soft ‘c’.

Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard ‘c’ will be dropped in favour of ‘k’.  This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekind year when the troublesome ‘ph’ will be replaced with ‘f’.  This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always been a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al will agre that the horibl mes of the silent ‘e’ in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the fourth yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing ‘th’ with ‘z’, and ‘w’ with ‘v’.  During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary ‘o’ kan be dropd from vords kontaining ‘ou’, and after ze fifz yer, ve vil hav a realy sensibl riten style.  Zer vil be no more trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza.  Ze drem of an united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze furst plas.

 

A SENIOR MOMENT

A ninety-eight year old woman wrote this to her bank. The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in ‘The Times’.

Dear Sir

I am writing to thank you for bouncing my cheque with which I endeavoured to pay my plumber last month.  By my calculations, three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the cheque and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honour it.  I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly deposit of my Pension, an arrangement which, I admit, has been in place for only eight years. You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account  £30 by way of penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank.

My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways. I noticed that whereas I personally attend to your telephone calls and letters, when I try to contact you I am confronted by the impersonal, overcharging, pre-recorded, faceless entity, which your bank has become.

From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood
person. My mortgage and loan payments will therefore and hereafter no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank by cheque, addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must nominate. Be aware that it is an offence under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope. Please find attached an Application Contact Status which I require your chosen employee to complete. I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative.  Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Solicitor, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets & liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof. In due course, I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me.  I regret that it cannot be shorter than twenty-eight digits but, again, I have modelled it on the number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your phone bank service. As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Let me level the playing-field even further. When you call me, press
buttons as follows:

1.       To make an appointment to see me.
2.       To query a missing payment.
3.       To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.
4.       To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping.
5.       To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.
6.       To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home.
7.       To leave a message on my computer (a password to access my computer is required. A password will be communicated to you at a later date to the Authorized Contact.)
8.       To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 - 8.
9.       To make a general complaint or inquiry; the contact will then be put on hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service. While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the duration of the call.

Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new arrangement.

May I wish you a happy, if ever so slightly less prosperous, New Year.

Your Humble Client

 

TOO BUSY TO STOP ...

How often do you hear people (or yourself) saying, ‘Sorry, I can’t, I’m too busy’, or ‘I’ve got too much on, I can’t think about that now’, or ‘I’ve been on the go all day, I can’t cope with anything else now’.  Now try replacing the word can’t with won’t and you will be taking responsibility for your time and decisions. It’s actually quite difficult to do because it sounds rude to say ‘I don’t want to do that now because I’m occupied with this’, but it’s a lot more honest.

As Christians we usually feel that saying ‘no’ to a request is being selfish and unhelpful. We are supposed to serve others, so surely we should try to do everything for everyone. Well, I certainly can try and then I look at the mess of unfinished, half-cut, bodged jobs that will do in a pinch, and I feel resentful, defensive and disappointed in myself. I could have done it much better, but I got sidetracked, and I didn’t really want to do it, but I had to ... didn’t I?

If you are busy doing what you like to do, then you are probably being useful and productive. It feels great to work hard, to get things done, and done well. The accomplishment and result can give you something to be proud of. But if it feels like a drag and you can’t quite manage it, then the chances are that you really didn’t want to do it in the first place. This is when claiming to be too busy becomes a socially-acceptable smokescreen to forestall other requests and to give the impression that you are being massively valuable and active. I know: I’ve done it, and I see colleagues at work buzzing around the office and then saying ... ‘I haven’t done a thing I wanted to do today’.

Each individual’s capacity for work varies and our perception of busyness is totally subjective, a bit like pain. How can you tell how busy I am? By how fast I talk? Or by a generally harassed and stressful state of being?  In my work some people think that driving four hours for a two-hour meeting then driving four hours home is a busy day. No, it’s a crazy day and they choose to do it, because feeling busy makes them feel important – and anyway they get paid. I’ve spent hundreds of days on many different IT and sales projects which just fizzled away to nothing. The client decided not to make a decision; they needed to consult other consultants; the IT budget needed re-working etc. I felt busy and I was being paid and we need the money – but was it a worthwhile use of my time?

The truth is we can only be doing something worthwhile when we are doing God’s work. But without direct communication how can we discern what is really God’s work? Well, God wants us to be fulfilled, challenged and happy so that must be a major clue. We know when we’re doing something worthwhile because we feel motivated, absorbed in the work and inspired to do it well. I recall some of my favourite times were when I was in the thick of things, helping out on ordinary tasks like serving drinks to hundreds of revellers on New Year’s Eve, or laughing with friends whilst washing up after a big Christmas function or coaching a roomful of child actors. I didn’t even realise how busy I had been till my head hit the pillow. In all these tasks I felt that what I was doing was really useful, I was capable, the job was not beyond my abilities and I did it well. It may not have saved the world, but it made people happy and I felt that.

So why do we spend so much time being busy on the wrong things? I think it is because we don’t know what we want half the time, and duty says someone has to do the messy jobs and see it through even if it’s going to be a nightmare. It’s probably a British trait!

If we are too busy to stop, then it’s our own fault because we should be aware of what God wants us to do, no matter how tempting it is to blame others for loading us up. If Moses had turned the tablets over he would have found another commandment: ‘Don’t waste the time God gives you.’

That’s it for now, got to go, busy, busy, busy …

Mark Woodall

THE NOXIOUS WEED

With the ban on smoking in enclosed public places coming into force on July 1st, we reflect on the history of tobacco in Winchcombe – which was once for our town what opium now is for the Taleban.

In the early seventeenth century the cloth trade was in decline in Winchcombe, and the prosperity brought by pilgrims to the abbeys in the town and at Hailes was a distant memory.  So in 1619 a certain John Stratford from London bought land locally for the cultivation of tobacco – that ‘noxious weed’, in the words of King James I.  Several hundred people worked seasonally in its production, until it was banned in 1619 to protect trade with the new colonies across the Atlantic, especially Virginia.  John Stratford was ruined financially, and sought to revive his fortunes by growing flax.  But the citizens of Winchcombe were not so easily dissuaded – and the illegal cultivation of tobacco in the town flourished.
The rest of the seventeenth century saw a series of skirmishes (figurative and literal) as the authorities sought to stamp out tobacco production in England – and especially in Winchcombe.

In 1627 a further order in Privy Council forbade tobacco growing in England and ordered all crops destroyed.  The ban was as ineffective as the 1619 interdict, and in the 1630s William King was appointed as a local Searcher against the trade.  Even the local JPs however seem to have been involved in the business – a cottage-industry of growing tobacco furtively, and sending it “by secret ways” to London, where it was passed off as having come from Virginia or Bermuda.
A petition to parliament in 1652 led to legal production in that year only (though with the steep excise-duty of 3d per lb), but production continued thereafter – under increasing harassment by the authorities.  In 1654 the tobacco producers of Winchcombe hired 300 men on horse & foot to protect their lucrative crops, and four years later a troop of horse sent to destroy the crops was threatened by five or six hundred locals and forced to withdraw.

After the restoration of the monarchy, a fresh proclamation in 1661 imposed heavy fines on tobacco-growers, and the following year (the same year that our Prayer Book was revised and reissued) the Sheriff of Gloucestershire was summoned to London at the start of the growing season and ordered to suppress the trade.  The acreage under cultivation only increased, however – and the following year the penalties were further increased, to a fine of £10 for every rod or pole planted – a third of the sum being paid to the Exchequer, a third to the parish poor ... and a third to the informant!

In 1666 there were serious local riots in Winchcombe at attempts to impose the law, and the Sheriff’s life was endangered, and so the following year no fewer than 120 horse-guards were sent to cut down the crops.  In the following decade the violence was still continuing however, with a Constable, Nicholas Robinson, “badly mishandled” and his wife & family threatened.

Tobacco growing continued in Winchcombe into the 1680s, but by then there was a growing supply of better, cheaper tobacco from the colonies; so market-forces finally achieved what the law could not – the end of tobacco production in our parish.

John Partington

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